It"s Called "Justice"

This just in.

The Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr has presented the White House spin on the Mueller Report, before we see it naturally.

It turns out the Big MAGAt , known for being “very strong”, was suffering emotional stress and was “frustrated and angry” at the Russia investigation.

The Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr, by divine insight of con-servatism, knew the Big MAGAt’s emotional state without the pesky trouble of an actual interview from the worst liar in the history of the United States.

Well, that changes everything.

What this clearly means is it was not obstruction of justice, it was just “fighting back”. It’s about the delicate dictator’s “feelings”, you know.

Another shocking revelation was displayed this morning, especially in light of his open partisan bias in denouncing the Russia investigation in his job application letter.

The Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr represented the "independence" of our Justice Department by parroting “No collusion, no collusion” several times in his press conference.

Why does that ring a bell? “Collusion” still isn’t a legal term, but who cares when the political message is clear, amirite?

And let’s not forget to blame the “enemy of the people” in all this:

“As he entered into office, and sought to perform his responsibilities as President, federal agents and prosecutors were scrutinizing his conduct before and after taking office, and the conduct of some of his associates. At the same time, there was relentless speculation in the news media about the President's personal culpability. Yet, as he said from the beginning, there was in fact no collusion. And as the Special Counsel's report acknowledges, there is substantial evidence to show that the President was frustrated and angered by a sincere belief that the investigation was undermining his presidency, propelled by his political opponents, and fueled by illegal leaks. Nonetheless, the White House fully cooperated with the Special Counsel's investigation...”  ~ Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr

Of course, Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr would never lie. "Fully cooperated” means firing, and threatening to fire, the investigators while refusing to be interviewed under oath. Don the Con's lawyers' written statements claimed over 30 instances when his "greatest memory" couldn't remember, or didn't recall. He had “no independent recollection” where he was on the day of  the Trump Tower meeting with Russian agents. (He was in Trump Tower that day.)

And don't you know it should be treason for investigators to be "scrutinizing his conduct"? It's not like Dirty Don is a Democrat, for Satan's sake!

After all, the AG/White House spokesman’s job is to provide political cover for the leader he has sworn to loyally protect and defend. He was also clear about who Mueller worked for. And it was NOT the American people, silly ones.

Mueller worked only for Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr, who works only for Trump. Got it?

It’s called “justice”. Get over it.

Barr may have sworn to “support and defend the Constitution of the United States”, but what he really meant was to support, defend, protect and serve the interests of Dirty Don the Big MAGAt.

This affirms our sacred national standard of power and justice, “When the president does it, that means that it is not illegal.” This applies to Republicans only, obviously.

The short Q&A session was abruptly terminated after this highly inappropriate question was asked. “Is it an impropriety for you to come out and sort of spin the report before people are able to read it?”

"No", was Attorney General/White House spokesman Bill Barr's parting lie to the press, as he walked off.

Isn’t that just what the enemy of the people would ask?